Ever think you should have let the psychologist lead the way in the session?
I was going in to do more schema- therapy and rescripting but I did not stop talking. I just kept rambling on and telling her this and that. She did ask questions but I kept veering off , maybe I was subconsciously avoiding delving deep into the past again and having all those feelings resurfacing. Funny thing is that I actually wanted to do the schema-therapy and rescripting again, I was fully prepared.
I know, I know , you are thinking , it’s good to talk to your therapist, they may notice something in your rambling?
But now I only have 4 sessions left that are subsidised by Medicare. So I really need to make sure I use them wisely.
I’m just going to be completely honest and tell you I’m feeling extremely emotional and scared about my upcoming session this afternoon.
Last week I was left feeling drained after my first session of schema-therapy and rescripting (link in previous post). During the session I closed my eyes and found my safe place first, then my therapist introduced herself as my “saviour ” to be there for the “young Ms Eve” when she needs someone to stand up for her. We went back to a time in my life when I was under the age of 10 and I spoke about a time in my life that upset me. This is where I got very emotional 😭. My therapist would also ask if young Ms Eve needed a hug or to be picked up or to hold her hand. Of course, my therapist remains in her chair, these offers of comfort are just suggestive.
I cried and my body shook with all these past emotions coming to the surface. You know these feelings are there and you just think you’ve gotten over the past, but you just don’t realise that you haven’t really forgiven and forgotten things that happened. When you go back to those times it HURTS!
The idea of the session is to go back to a time when a particular event happened. To speak as you were then , in a present tense. Then the therapist asks what help you’d like, to talk to whoever caused this pain, to comfort you, to take you to a place that you feel safe etc… rescripting your reaction essentially.
At first it was weird for me, but after talking about it and hearing the therapist speak up for me , I started to feel calm.
I totally recommend this form of therapy if something in your past triggers hurt, insecurities, anxiety, fear etc…
I guess I’m fearful of getting so emotional during my sessions and not getting past the triggers.
I hope I’ve made some sense. 😊
I am continuing the challenge to be able to run 5km in 8 weeks.
It’s getting more difficult obviously because the running distance and time is stretched out further every week. The entire exercise only takes 30 minutes but it started at 1 1/2 min jog/ 1 1/2 min walk now it’s 5 min jog/ 3 min walk and I’m feeling it 😓. But I’m also very proud that I’m not giving up 😁.
Thank you to all of you for your encouragement.
Day 2 & 3 of my C25K 8 week challenge. I’m not sure if I’m keeping up to date with the challenge. Last week, I had some time off from the gym to spend quality time with my man before he left for his holiday .
Now that I have more time this month to do a lot of things (due to a slow month at work), I plan on hitting the gym more. I’m cooking more and baking more and freezing snacks. Otherwise, I would stuff my face with sugary and salty junk.
I eat when I’m bored and starve when I’m stressed. So, now I’m prepping food.
Anyway here’s my results on my C25K challenge.
Thanks for joining me on this journey of self discovery.