I am strong…

Next week I am taking my man and his son to the airport to see them off on there Greek adventure. 

I’m excited for them, but I will miss my bf terribly. I am a much stronger, mature woman now and I’m so happy that they can go explore another country. If all goes well and bf finds what he is looking for there then we will go back there together later in the year.

I love my man very much and more than anything want him to be happy 😊. In the past year I’ve learned that being selfish doesn’t make me happy, but seeing others happy helps me on my journey to true happiness. 

My love makes me happy.

E.

Not PTSD…

During my psychologist appointment the other day the dr concluded that I do not suffer ptsd. Simply because I do not look over my shoulder in fear, I don’t freak out over loud noises and I don’t have dreams that cause me to feel like I’m back in the bad situation.

My “problem ” is worthlessness, low self confidence and the need to seek approval from people. Stemming from childhood.

We are going to work on building up my confidence and treating myself better. Not being afraid of making decisions for myself… I tend to overthink even the smallest things and how it is going to affect someone else( my bf, my children, my friends, my bosses etc) . I don’t want to be a disappointment which means often I miss out on things that may be good for me. 

I want nothing more than to be a confident, respected and trusted woman. 

E.

My goal …

I’m following Discovering Your Happiness and she has a fitness goal to reach, it’s great to see her get closer and closer to it. So, I decided to follow suit.

My goal is to run (or at least jog) 5 km in 8 weeks. I have downloaded the C25K app (couch to 5k) and I started it yesterday. I got to 4km on the treadmill in 30mins jog/walk 1min/90secs with 4 minutes warm up at the beginning (which I ran :)) and 4 minutes cool down. My average speed was 7.25km/hr. 

My aim is for fitness not weight loss, I may (see I said “may”) try a charity event some time in the near future.


E.